Euphoria

Dear Boot Camp Diary,

I spent about 75 seconds On Tuesday in a full gymnastic bridge, with my forehead on the ground, back arched, hips high, feet flat on the ground. I have been working into the position slowly. The world was throbbing and bright when I righted myself. Pulsing and vibrant.

Heroin! Crack! What is this drug?! Acid.

Everything so pretty, every cell so alive, head reeling. Can this be the same world I was in 90 seconds ago? Impossible!

Daniel chimed in and explained that those of us who’d been in a full bridge (as opposed to partial) might be feeling kind of funny.

Funny?

I am high. I am so happy! What is the meaning of this?!

The meaning is simple: Full Gymnastic Bridge x 90 seconds = Euphoria. Something about the spine “awakening”… probably also something about excess blood in the head region. Either way… bliss!

This bliss was part of what Daniel referred to as “Taking it Easy Day”. “Lots of stretching,” he explained, “Yesterday was very intense.” It’s true – as I explained in my last post Daniel happily handed my ass to me on Monday and left me standing around with my tongue hanging out of my mouth.

However, I must tell you never to breathe a sigh of relief when Daniel says “Taking it Easy Day”. While he does mean that the workout will be, perhaps, lower impact, he will still make you hold impossible upside down stretching positions until your quads tremble and your arms scream.

Your mind says, “This can’t be hard. All we are doing is holding still.”
And your body replies to your mind, “If it’s so easy then YOU get down here and do it.”

And amidst their bickering, you suffer. In the good way of course.

Then you go home, eat protein and glutamine, sleep well, worry in anticipation for a day of outside workout on Mt. Tabor and wake up early to report to the cold, icy darkness of a large hill (in fact it is a volcano proper) in the heart of Portland. You run up one side of Tabor and then drop to your hands and toes and crank out pushups. You huff and puff and hold your hands above your head while lunging for 200 yards. Your mind tells you that this shouldn’t be very hard either yet, strangely, it is.

Near the end you’re told to run to the top of a hill, which is called a mountain. You’re on the southern side which is exposed and ripping with a head wind. You’re at the front of the group, huffing slowly up a long grade, each breath burning a little more. You stop later, do more pushups (all the while with little bits of gravel grinding through your gloves into your palm), kick out some burpees, do bunny-hops up endless flights of stairs and then finally stretch your legs out in long, soft strides while you make a fast descent back to the the bottom of the hill.

This is Boot Camp, people. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

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